Entry tags:
first recording.
Considering this my first post on this personal blog.
The normal internet is much too loud and much too crowded, and its nice to be posting somewhere where there is little expectation to the content I post here.
I feel like the posts i have to make on regular websites have to be an extremely curated version of myself, even on privated "X" social accounts, posting feels much more like a marketing campaign than an actual personal thing I can keep of my own. I'm hoping that this will provide a quiet space in the depths of the web for me to post and feel less pressure for what I write and not concern myself with who happens to find it.
I am trying to keep a pessimist's version of optimism for the new year, and am trying to tell myself there is no choice but to press forward. I spent most of 2023 feeling like a corpse walking around that was wondering over and over why I was bones walking around living flesh with beating hearts and expansive thoughts. I continue to feel set back in life, unable to press forward in a society that works against me and not with me. Perhaps this soft reset allows me to finally build away from the structures and cycles i can never find myself able to break out from.
Pluto finally moved out of my personal planets, and even if the stars and the planets hold no regard or mercy for me I can't help but hope that its a sign that I can finally feel like things going forward will be okay.
I hold no expectation, neither positive or negative, its a good way to keep myself from being too enthused or disappointed.
The normal internet is much too loud and much too crowded, and its nice to be posting somewhere where there is little expectation to the content I post here.
I feel like the posts i have to make on regular websites have to be an extremely curated version of myself, even on privated "X" social accounts, posting feels much more like a marketing campaign than an actual personal thing I can keep of my own. I'm hoping that this will provide a quiet space in the depths of the web for me to post and feel less pressure for what I write and not concern myself with who happens to find it.
I am trying to keep a pessimist's version of optimism for the new year, and am trying to tell myself there is no choice but to press forward. I spent most of 2023 feeling like a corpse walking around that was wondering over and over why I was bones walking around living flesh with beating hearts and expansive thoughts. I continue to feel set back in life, unable to press forward in a society that works against me and not with me. Perhaps this soft reset allows me to finally build away from the structures and cycles i can never find myself able to break out from.
Pluto finally moved out of my personal planets, and even if the stars and the planets hold no regard or mercy for me I can't help but hope that its a sign that I can finally feel like things going forward will be okay.
I hold no expectation, neither positive or negative, its a good way to keep myself from being too enthused or disappointed.